Review

Book Review
By Joleene Wouk, DD
Personal Growth and Development Class, Spring 1999
College of the Desert, Palm Desert, California

TITLE: Life Strategies

AUTHOR: Phillip C. McGraw, PH.D.

According to Oprah Winfrey, Dr. McGraw is responsible for helping her see what she needed to do to win her case against the beef industry in Amarillo, Texas. After her triumphant victory she inspired Dr. McGraw to write this book so others would benefit from his knowledge and experience in dealing with life in a realistic and honest fashion.

Having experienced failure and loss in my own life without really understanding what had caused the problems, I too was inspired to get with the program. The information this book has to offer will be life changing for me and for you too.

"Life Strategies" offers ten life laws that govern how things are, not just the authors opinions. They are as follows:

Dr. McGraw begins his book with a brief overview of his experience with Oprah and then prepares you for getting in touch with reality so you too can be a winner in life. Included in this preparation the author offers a category of living situations for you to assess your own life, the first two assignments to get you thinking, and a reality check. Then he takes you step by step through each of the life laws giving life experiences , more assignments, and instruction for using the life laws in your daily activities.

Within the life laws themselves are other mini-laws that apply to "doing what works, doing what matters". For example, in Life Law #1 he lists eight types of information we need to gather about another person in order to understand where they are coming from. Then he identifies ten significant characteristics of human functioning and you have another assignment. This chapter alone can make all the difference in the world in your relationships.

Life Law #2 will be somewhat difficult for a person in denial about how life is. The author makes it very plain that we are accountable for our own actions and lists a page of questions we should be willing to ask ourselves along with factual statements about where blame in situations really lies. No victims here —read it and weep. Dr. McGraw describes eighteen styles that people use when interacting with others. This was enlightening. Two more assignments are offered to get you further on to where you want to be.

Reading on we come to Life Law #3 which is a real eye opener about why people do what they hate, including ourselves, and don’t do what they want to do. Another assignment here will deal with the specific behaviors that may be troubling you in your own life. I don’t even want to give away the punch line here. Just read the book and do the assignments.

By now you either get it or you don’t, and if you put the book down you will miss out on the rest of the story —doing what matters. Life Law #4 is another reality check about yourself, your life and everybody in it. It requires truth about what’s working and what’s not so you can make the necessary changes to get the results you want for yourself. There are more hard questions to ask yourself here, but being honest about what needs to be fixed in your life will invigorate you to the point of action which is Life Law #8.

"Make careful decisions and then pull the trigger" (p. 127). I love the way the author talks. Being a good ol’ boy from Texas, he tells it like it is and that’s what we need to get on with life and stop being a victim. Life Law #5 is so true, life truly does reward action, even though the action is sometimes not what we expected or wanted. There are three assignments in this chapter that will absolutely improve your life. Just do it!

Now that you did it, you are ready for Dr. McGraw to teach you about the difference between reality and perception in Life Law #6 . This is a biggy folks. You’ve heard the statement, "looking at the world through rose colored glasses", well we do that from time to time and the assignments will help you focus on our limiting beliefs and false perceptions. The examples he writes about are so clear and the assignment will make you reach into the depths of yourself for answers you may not want to hear.

Are you ready to take charge of your life? Good! After you read Life Law #7 you’ll be off and running, hopefully toward life, not away from it. I heard a new term here, "life manager", and I look at my own life in a new way. I manage my life and I’m doing a better job of it than I have in the past and now that after learning Life Law #8, I can teach others how I want to be treated. So I manage myself better and others treat me like I want them to most of the time. There is an excellent Relationship Questionnaire in the assignment that will get at the heart of why we get treated the way we do by others. Along with this law is Life Law #9 "which will open your eyes to what anger and resentment will do to you" (p. 200). Forgiveness is powerful and it must begin with forgiving yourself so your perception is clear and you can forgive others.

Life Law #10 is not what it looks like from the title. Dr. McGraw is not advocating what some name it and claim it religious belief systems are teaching. This law is about knowing what you want so you recognize it when it’s standing in front of you. That can be very useful don’t you think? Of course the assignment is asking some hard questions again but by now you are used to it, like it, have benefited from doing the assignments so much you look forward to more hard questions. Well, maybe that’s too optimistic, but close.

I recommend this book to all who want to make a difference in life and are sick and tired of being sick and tired. Dr. McGraw will motivate you into self evaluation and encourage you to act in a way that will change your life forever. Get your Life Strategy on today!